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Tuesday, October 29, 2013

Hey guys, sorry it's been a few days, wifi went down again.

Anyway, just a reminder, I really need you guys to ----->go here<----- and put in your vote for me to work on possibly getting a free car. You can put in as many votes as you want, just one vote per day, and I need as many as I can get.

Thanks a bunch guys. I'm off to go apply at more places.

Signing off,
Lily

Tuesday, October 22, 2013

Hey guys, I found a way you can help me out, in the most fantastic way. So, Nojuan's computer is messed up so I'm on Xan's right now so I can write this. I don't know how often he'll be able to let me on here to give you guys updates until Nojuan's laptop is fixed, or I get my laptop back out of pawn, so this might be the last blog for a few days/weeks/who knows.

But if you could please go --->here<--- and click on the VOTE FOR ME link, I would greatly appreciate it.

On that page you'll see what I need your help with. You don't have to give money or anything like that, just give me your votes to help me. What are you helping with? You're helping me win a lottery of sorts, where they give the winners a free car and only people in need are allowed to apply for this lottery. Now the more votes I have in, the more likely of a chance I stand at getting a car, and subsequently, getting back on my feet and out of the hole I'm in.

If I could get a car then everything would be okay again since I wouldn't be transportation-challenged anymore. So please, please, please folks, go to the link ---->here it is again<---- and click the VOTE FOR ME button on the right side of the info screen. Thank you very much for your help guys. Any help you did give is highly appreciated.

Signing off,
Lily

Saturday, October 19, 2013

While Nojuan is in the shower, I'm going to take this chance to give you guys an update as to what all's going on.

So, I got my store transfer. I'm now at the Baker Road store officially, and I'm really glad it happened because I'm happy again. I look forward to work again, and it's not threatened by worry that Tyler will be there, or that he'll show up. No more Tyler.

The best part about it? My improvements have actually been noticed by the people at the new store in such a way I'm getting props all over the place. If anything does come up it's a simple fix and I'm not treated like a piece of dirt over a small thing. The store manager, Jenny, she's such a sweetheart and she's super happy I'm there. So is Dillon, the assistant manager. Hell, even the other staff members are happy to have me there, so it's nice to be at a place I'm so welcome at.

To give you an idea, to finally put into perspective, exactly how bad it was at my store, and for how long it had been going on, I'm going to tell you about something that happened today. Dillon and I were busting our tails on the make line and while we're working he's telling me about how him and Jenny had been talking about me earlier today. He was telling me the different things, and he got to where he said, "I mean, from the first day you got here, your speed, your performance, has increased at least 4000 times," and I had to stop him. Because after how much I had been put down by my boss, the person who controlled my job basically, to hear this come from someone whose opinion matters in regards to my job stability, it was too much. I played it off in a playful way that he needed to stop or I was going to cry, but I meant it.

If he had kept going on, with anything else, I would honestly have cried because it was something I desperately needed to hear. That Tyler wasn't right, that I wasn't imagining my progress. From someone in a management position who needed to see it for the sake of my job. To hear it, was just too much for my abused morale. My work spirit has been so beaten down by the constant barrage of abuse by Tyler and his words/actions against my work, that to hear I was right about my improvements was such an elation I couldn't handle it.

When it died back down I had to go hide in the bathroom long enough to get myself back together from the pieces Dillon had almost crumbled me into without knowing it. I don't fully let my emotions show at work, when it's negative things, so they have no idea just how bad my emotional state has been over all this abuse. And I would rather keep it that way to be honest. I don't like having my emotions be out of control at work, it looks bad, it's not professional...

Anyway, going past that... Olive Garden ended up not happening because my friend was supposed to give me a ride, even said he would the prior night, then 15 minutes before we're supposed to leave for said interview, he backs out. He said he wasn't giving rides to anyone anymore since it was interfering with his personal life. Why the Hell he couldn't tell me that the night before instead of saying yes I have no idea. I could have found someone else. Or even if he had told me that day, way in advance of the interview so that I could have had longer than 15 minutes to find someone who could have given me a ride.

So I still have no second job, which I do still need until jenny can give me more hours, she has me working 4 days this upcoming schedule at least, but until she can give me more hours I need everything I can get. I don't know what my checks are going to be like, or whether they'll be enough for rent...

I don't even know what we're going to do about Monday and Tuesday. If I could make it until Wednesday then we would be fine because that's when I get paid, but I don't know where we're going to come up with the $60 (USD) to make it those two days. We're good for tomorrow's room rate, but after that, we're screwed unless $60 falls out of the sky. Like that would happen...

Anyway, so I had to pawn my laptop to get us until Sunday, so I don't know when I'll be able to give you guys another update. I still use my Facebook and Twitter, which are to the right on this screen, and I can access those from my phone, but not the blogger system. So keep an eye out there for little snippets until the next time I can hop on Nojuan's computer. I think I just heard the shower cut off so I'm hopping off of here so he can get back to what he was doing when he comes out.

Signing off,
Lily

Saturday, October 12, 2013

Okay, so I'm getting just a little sick and tired of King le Douche, aka Tyler... Tonight I was at the Baker Road Domino's and the fox, Dillon, asked me if I knew anyone who could close tomorrow night, as a shift leader. I told him I needed to call my store since I know Catherine sometimes needs extra hours. When I called, I asked Collin to go ahead and give me my hours for next week, so I knew what kind of note to leave Jenny, the manager at the Baker Road store, about possibly subbing there again next week.

I don't have any. Tyler doesn't even have me on the schedule for one day, not even one hour. I sent him a text and asked him why, but he hasn't replied to me yet. But after I sent him that text, I did text Mike, his boss, to see if he could help me get hours at any store this week. Him and I talked for a bit in regards to what I work the rest of this week, and when he thinks I might be able to get in at other stores.

Domino's drama aside, I had my 2nd interview at the Olive Garden over in the Town Centre area of Barrett. It went REALLY good ^_^. I'm very positive over how the interview went, because the guy I spoke to today, told me to call him back on Monday, to get a time for an interview on Tuesday with the lady that actually does the hiring. That will be the final interview to decide whether or not I get the job. I really hope I do get it because I can't keep struggling like this with Domino's.

I'm not the type of person to quit a job, I stay there until they fire me, but I'm on the verge of quitting there. I'm seriously thinking about just getting settled in at Olive Garden, make sure it's going to work out, and then when I get settled in there, put in my 2 weeks at Domino's.

Then again, if I do get the car that I'm going to be looking at tomorrow, then at least I can see about getting transferred to a different Domino's. I LOVE working at the Baker Road store, because the people there are so friendly, and even when things get busy, they've all learned how to work together as a team, in a way I haven't seen since I worked with Saul, an old Raccoon, at 7-Eleven. They don't need to communicate with each other. They've all become so in-tuned with one another that they just have to look at each other, and they know what to do. That kind of team work is absolutely awesome, and if I do end up staying with Domino's then you know what? I DO want a transfer to that store. I want to be a part of THAT team.

Anyway, I need to hop off of here. I'm going to apply at a few more places in case Olive Garden doesn't work out.

Signing off,
Lily

Thursday, October 10, 2013

Okay, so far things are looking up a little. I had an interview at Olive Garden recently and the interviewing manager told me to call the hiring manager today if I hadn't heard from him yet. I called the hiring manager and I have one more interview, tomorrow at 2, and that will be the one that decides whether or not I get hired. Wish me luck.

Also, back in the last post from me I mentioned Kyle was willing to help me with getting a car as long as he can look at it first. I kind of have one in mind, but it's a Pontiac... The same make/model my gram has, that has given her nothing but trouble since day one of owning it. I owned a pontiac once, and in the span of the 2 years I suffered through it, I needed a radiator twice and a new trans by the end of it, so I'm not even sure I want to touch another Pontiac after that. However, if I can get it for now, and just hold on to it until I can save up for a better car, I can use it as part of a down payment, maybe a trade-in, so technically speaking it could benefit me in the end.

I'm having the guy who owns it bring it by tomorrow, as well as having Kyle come over tomorrow to take a look at it and see if it's worth the $700(USD) investment it's going to wind up being. Kyle said he'd help with 3-400, and the guy is willing to finish it out in payments, so something can be worked out in general. Wish me luck there too please. Right now I need all the luck I can get.

Anyway, I really don't have anything else to talk about today, I've only somewhat recently woke up and everyone is still passed out. Apparently they didn't go to bed until super late again, and I've got to walk the dog when I finish typing this up.

Oh, before I go, I'd like to open up an option to you guys. If there is anything you would like to ask me, feel free to click one of my contact buttons and ask. From today 10-10 until 10-16, I'll be gathering questions that you guys send me and I'll be answering them here on 10-18. Why not 10-17? I don't do anything on that day. Ever. I request the day off of work, I would stay out of school, I don't even go anywhere. Is stay holed up at home and be extra careful of what I eat/drink. Something bad happens on that day every single year, and has since I was 8. Every. Single. Year.

Signing off,
Lily

Monday, October 7, 2013

Today was ridiculous. God I hurt. I'm in so much pain it kills me to even lay down. I had my adrenaline going all day so I didn't even notice how much I was pushing myself until I got home and it was no longer pulsing through my veins. Now I wish I could just crawl under a rock for a little while. Maybe the pressure covering me would make me forget the pain for a little while...

So... Friday I told Tyler I needed to make sure I had the 12th off since I have jury duty, and he told me I'm only working Saturday and Sunday... Wait...What? So I asked him, why did I only have 2 days the entire week? Keep in mind folks, back on the 28th I mentioned to you guys that my boss was going to give me the assistant manager position when Kyle leaves, as of today as a matter of fact....

"Well, I'm bringing in a new guy, to do fill the assistant manager position." But... But I told him I wanted to accept his offer of me filling that spot. He knew I was going for it when Kyle was gone because HE OFFERED IT TO ME! When I told him, "Wait, I'm confused, I thought we agreed I was going to have that spot," you know what his response was? "Well, I don't have to train him. He's already an assistant manager at another store."

Rewind back to August... He had a store meeting, where he told us all he wanted to promote people from within the store, "So I don't have to hire people that are going to take away from everyone's hours. I want to train someone who's familiar with this store and the way it goes instead of bringing someone who's never seen the store."

"Well I don't have to train him.".... "I don't have to train him." "I want to train someone who's familiar with this store." HOW THE HELL DO THOSE TWO EVEN MATCH UP!? So not only did he lie to me just last week, he lied to everyone back in August.

I HATE liars. When we know each other, and you lie to me, especially about something as big as this, it shows me I can't trust you. I ended up talking to his manager, Mike, about what had happened because I needed to find out from him if he knew of any stores in our area that needed anybody on the inside sometime this week coming up so I can make some money somewhere. I already talked to the manager at the Baker Road store myself since I've been a driver at that store when they needed me before, and she managed to get me 2 days, but I still need one or two more days to even make anything count.

So now I work Wednesday, then Friday-Sunday total, which leaves me Monday, Tuesday and Thursday to work with at another store.  Mike actually cares about his employees so he told me he was going to try to get me in at the Canton Road store, and he's got the manager set up to give me a call either today or tomorrow to discuss the schedule together and see what we can come up with. Hopefully something comes from this, I can't keep stressing like this.

But at least I might be getting another car sometime soon, depends on how things work out to be honest. Kyle, the one whose spot I had been promised said he can help me out with getting one if I can pay him back bit by bit until Christmas. Which, if I get another car, I can get back on the road, and I can save up the money for him in no time. Plus if Tyler tries to fuck me over any further, Mike already told me he would make sure I was taken care of since he knows I'm a good worker, that I'm just going through a hard time right now...

Anyway, I'm going to try to go to bed, see if I can escape this pain for a bit. Thanks for listening to me.

Signing off,
Lily

Thursday, October 3, 2013

*****Warning, this blog contains some pretty dark views and rantings, so if you're not in the mood to read downer stuff, tune in next time. Hopefully it'll be better then.*****

I just don't know what to do anymore... I really don't. I'm losing what little will I have left, and it's going fast. It's like my dam broke and everything is over-flowing too fast for me to fix it in any way.

1) I didn't get Walgreens because the detox I usually do failed me this time, so the shot I had at a second job is fucked. So I need to hit the streets again to look for a different job possibility, while trying to explain to Domino's why I didn't start up at Walgreens. - On that note, I don't think I'll be hanging out with Mary for a while.

2) I still have no car, so job hunting/interviews are a bitch right now, almost damn near impossible. Somehow on my pathetic paycheck, until Xan gets a job, I have to find money for food (we're out), rent (we're almost homeless), and save up for a car... I'm stretched so far right now, and there are no day labor places around me to where I can make some fast money. All my secret shop places don't have anything in my area that I can even get to, there's just so much...

3) Going back to #1, the only reason I smoke is for my back pain. Every single day of my life, I am in pain, in one way or another due to problems with my back, that cause shock waves into my hips and legs. I have an ulcer so I can't take the amount of pills I need to even touch the pain in my back. Honestly the way I see it is this. I can either smoke something that causes momentary loopyness, maybe hunger, maybe drowsiness, and then it's gone later. Or I can take pills that come with worse side-effects, including messing with my ulcer.

I need to live in somewhere like CO where it wouldn't matter anymore, so I could be pain free without turning into a pill head or worrying about Johnny Law knocking on my door. This whole anti-weed thing going on in USA is stupid. It really is. I never smoke before work, only after, I don't even risk smoking until after I'm sure I won't be called in, or if it's too late and works calls after I started, guess what? I can't get a ride, or I had a drink, I can't come in. The only irresponsible thing I do is the fact that I smoke weed. That's it. And it's caused me to not get a second job, which I desperately need, all because there are people who don't take the precautions I do.

4) Xan still does not have a job. He has possibilities, but that's about it. I need more results than that, especially if I'm going to let him keep staying here. I do need him around for a second check when he does get a job, but he needs to get it first to be useful. Right now, he's just using resources we really can't spare...

That's pretty much it... As I said earlier, sorry this was a downer blog, I'm just feeling the weight of everything coming down. To be honest I haven't eaten in 24 hours and with how stressed and depressed I am, I'm not even hungry...

Signing off,
Lily